XXX
I was wondering something. An issue that makes little Sunday-Schoolers and even most freshman here at school shivers and make little "ooh" sounds. It’s the issue of sex before marriage and the whole virginity/purity battle. Even now the mention of sex has probably intrigued those who are used to reading my blog about social issues, love, value and other softy stuff. Well. This one's about SEX. I want opinions and attempts at answers.
As my best friend has said to some of her fellow health majors, "sex is real, why fear it."
Here's what I'm sitting on the tracks about...
I'm a 23-year-old man. I am about to graduate from a four-year university in 3 weeks, get a job in less than a month, and be married in August. More importantly, I love my fiancé and she loves me. We are committed to each other forever and that's no joke. In fact, if something happened to not allow us get married and only date. We would be content dating each other for the rest of our lives. In fact, I am in contact with many engaged guys who are in the same situation.
That said. There is a lot of temptation and "emotional pull" towards having sex when a relation enters a time of real love and commitment. Speaking bluntly...it is so much of a struggle that most couples have to change their schedules around so that they won’t risk being alone together and have any opportunity to “slip.”
Now before you think I’m an idiot…let me get to the point. Me and my wonderful fiancé’ are not, in any way, considering stealing each other’s virginity until we are married…so stop penciling us into you prayer list. We both grew up in the church and will remain in the church until we die…we understand and are willing to hold to what we have been taught about sex before marriage. I trust the motives of the old dead church fathers who first began enforcing this rule, even if I never met them, I can understand the principle behind it.
What reasons can you give me for us to not ‘go all the way,’ besides social rejection?” Besides the fact that the church would shun us, what reasons can you give us or others in our situations, for not having sex? We’re in love; we’re committed to each other until death (I can’t prove that in writing but let’s pretend that you believe me), and are at a point in our relationship that all couples get to when they are drawn to move onto the next level of intimacy. We’ve grown over the last two years emotionally, spiritually, and now it seems so natural to grow in physical intimacy.
So you’ve got the facts, the question, and some pretty personal thoughts and, dare I say, ‘borderline gossip.’ What do you got for me? Any opinions? Thoughts? 5-point Calvinist proof texts?
For those of you going into ministry…what are you going to tell a couple of kids who come to you in the same situation? Do you think a couple of people who didn’t grow up in the church are really going to listen to you tell them, “There’s no verses on that subject, but church tradition has saved sex for the marriage bed.” If I were them, I would laugh at you. And you would be offended.
I'm done writing now...
Jared Bell
As my best friend has said to some of her fellow health majors, "sex is real, why fear it."
Here's what I'm sitting on the tracks about...
I'm a 23-year-old man. I am about to graduate from a four-year university in 3 weeks, get a job in less than a month, and be married in August. More importantly, I love my fiancé and she loves me. We are committed to each other forever and that's no joke. In fact, if something happened to not allow us get married and only date. We would be content dating each other for the rest of our lives. In fact, I am in contact with many engaged guys who are in the same situation.
That said. There is a lot of temptation and "emotional pull" towards having sex when a relation enters a time of real love and commitment. Speaking bluntly...it is so much of a struggle that most couples have to change their schedules around so that they won’t risk being alone together and have any opportunity to “slip.”
Now before you think I’m an idiot…let me get to the point. Me and my wonderful fiancé’ are not, in any way, considering stealing each other’s virginity until we are married…so stop penciling us into you prayer list. We both grew up in the church and will remain in the church until we die…we understand and are willing to hold to what we have been taught about sex before marriage. I trust the motives of the old dead church fathers who first began enforcing this rule, even if I never met them, I can understand the principle behind it.
What reasons can you give me for us to not ‘go all the way,’ besides social rejection?” Besides the fact that the church would shun us, what reasons can you give us or others in our situations, for not having sex? We’re in love; we’re committed to each other until death (I can’t prove that in writing but let’s pretend that you believe me), and are at a point in our relationship that all couples get to when they are drawn to move onto the next level of intimacy. We’ve grown over the last two years emotionally, spiritually, and now it seems so natural to grow in physical intimacy.
So you’ve got the facts, the question, and some pretty personal thoughts and, dare I say, ‘borderline gossip.’ What do you got for me? Any opinions? Thoughts? 5-point Calvinist proof texts?
For those of you going into ministry…what are you going to tell a couple of kids who come to you in the same situation? Do you think a couple of people who didn’t grow up in the church are really going to listen to you tell them, “There’s no verses on that subject, but church tradition has saved sex for the marriage bed.” If I were them, I would laugh at you. And you would be offended.
I'm done writing now...
Jared Bell
posted by Jared at 8:34 PM
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